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Editorial
When Going Along Means Going Wrong
Andreea Retea
I learned early that corruption was a way of life. Later on, I learned that it doesn’t have to be.
When I was in the second grade, I found out that some of my classmates were getting private instruction from my teacher. I thought that was strange, because she was supposed to be giving the same lessons to all of us and grading us according to what we did in class. I didn't understand what "double standard" meant.
Later on, I saw that those whose parents paid for private lessons tended to get straight A's. I thought that was unfair to the rest of us. About the same time, I noticed that a lot of parents would bring teachers and school secretaries flowers and other little presents; and that their kids were treated better than the rest of us.
Medical care was similar. Grownups said it was essential to bring a little "present" when going to see the doctor. So when I was old enough to visit on my own, I always did.
When I started traveling on trains, it was often hard to afford the official fare. But I learned quickly that if I slipped the conductors a little cash, they didn't bother with a ticket.
Updating my ID card was always faster and easier if the request was accompanied by money. I got caught speeding a few times. It was surprising how a few lei could turn an intimidating policeman into a friendly guy.
University dorm rooms are supposed to be assigned according to grades, but money and connections make it a lot easier to get one. It all seemed natural. It still does. It's even part of the language. Words like bribery and corruption sound harsh. Softer expressions like kindness, appreciation and gratitude are easier on the ear.
And playing by the rules is like committing social suicide. I've tried. Once I refused to pay a doctor because I had medical insurance, but eventually I gave in to the pressure. My parents had warned me to go along, and they were right. Other people in the waiting room were holding envelopes, talking openly about how much they contained. Some pointed fingers at me. The doctor kept finding other things to do. There was no time for me. So I showed some financial gratitude and got my appointment.
I'm not proud of that. It was an important lesson, though. I'll use a harsh word and call it corruption, and the lesson was that corruption is taught everywhere: at home, in schools, at the doctor’s office, in government offices, on the street.
Every parent who does is it teaching a child how to do it. It's like a never-ending chain. It will take a lot of people and a lot of time to break it. But travel has taught me another lesson: other countries get along just fine without it. When it's time for me to have children, I'd like to teach them a different way. It would be nice to think I could show them by example, but I'm not sure that will be possible. Everybody does it, after all. It's a way of life. But at least I can tell them it doesn't have to be.
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